Every new year brings with it the promise of a fresh start and the hope that we can be better, healthier and more successful. If quitting smoking is one of your goals for 2020, I applaud you! Smoking is singularly the most devastating thing you can do to your health and the cause of many diseases, which can easily be avoided by simply NOT smoking. If you are wondering how to quit smoking, read on.
MY LAST CIGARETTE EVER
2nd April 2015 was the day I smoked my last and final cigarette. I felt like a heavy veil lifted after I was set free from this horrible addiction that plagued me for more than 20 years. My life has changed dramatically since I quit smoking. The year I quit, I became Singapore’s Health Promotion Board ambassador for the “Step Up For A Quitter” campaign. It was an incredible experience that allowed me to share my journey with others and inspire them to quit smoking too. It also helped to reaffirm my decision to stub out for good.
The years since have been a revelation of sorts. Breaking free from any addiction for good requires lots of self-reflection. It is only through these realizations that you can honestly face those inner demons that created those deeply seated self-sabotaging thought patterns. After all, our thoughts determine our actions and habits.
Your attitude makes a huge difference in how successful you will be at quitting for good. If you think you are depriving yourself of something enjoyable, the process will be much more arduous. You already know that smoking is bad for you and that quitting is going to be challenging. So why not do it joyfully?
HOW I GOT HOOKED ON CIGARETTES
I must have been about 12 years old the first time I saw the movie “Grease”. I remember that scene so vividly. You know, the final scene where “goody-two-shoes” Sandy Olsson (Olivia Newton-John) made that dramatic appearance in that slinky all black, leather ensemble, smoking a cigarette?
The bad girl makeover was designed to impress her T-Bird crush, Danny Zuko (John Travolta) who had been acting like their summer romance never happened and making her feel like a loser for “catching the feels”. (Ugh! Why do girls fall for that crap?) Well, the ruse worked. They break into song, finally admitting to each other that “you’re the one that I want”, before ridiculously flying off into the sky in that Grease Lightning car, presumably living happily ever after.
The fun choreography, colourful costumes and catchy songs, combined with Danny’s rugged good looks & bad boy swagger, were enough to make pre-teen Cheryl all starry-eyed. Not only did I memorize every song in that 1978 movie, but I also made this strong association – smoking equalled “being cool”. Smoking also got you accepted by the cool kids. Aaah.. summer lovin’ happened so fast.
The Seed Was Planted
That year, I tried my first cigarette. My mum is a smoker and often left half-smoked butts in the ashtrays around the house. I remember lighting up in the bathroom and that dizzying head rush after taking that first puff. I remember feeling all grown up and thinking it had these magical powers to transform me from this shy, insecure girl into someone people would pay attention to.
Sneaking that illicit puff was something I would do when my parents were out of the house and when I was left to begrudgingly babysit my two younger brothers. It was my escape, just like my very own Grease Lightning car that could fly me up and away from any sadness or uncomfortable situation.
I imagined myself doing what Olivia Newton-John’s character did in the closing scene in “Grease”. As my chariot in the sky swept me away, I would turn back with a triumphant grin and wave at all the people below, gobsmacked at my ability to get the guy and win at life. Oh, how I would gloat over all those envious people, cigarette in hand, finally a full-fledged member of the Pink Ladies.
So that was the start of how I got hooked on to cigarettes. Do you remember how and when it started for you?
Everyone Starts Out as a Social-Smoker
I wasn’t a hardcore smoker right away. After experimenting with smoking in my early teens, I only bought my first pack of cigarettes at 18 (the legal age to buy cigarettes in Singapore). I started as a “light smoker” with Virginia Slims. The box would last maybe a week or two. But by 20, I had moved on to Marlboro Lights and was smoking a pack a day. Such is the nature of addiction. It is a constant craving that is never satisfied until it is fed more … and then some. Where does it end? Unfortunately, for many, only when you’re dead, or like me, you get sick from it.
After over 20 years of smoking on average a pack a day, my tolerance increased to 30 sticks a day. I now have adult asthma and mild emphysema as a result. The difficulty in breathing has made it hard to sleep through the night without needing my inhalers. Some nights I can’t even sleep. While the impairment and scarring to my lungs are minor, it has had an effect on every area of my life. The inhalers dry out my throat and affect my voice when I speak on radio. And when I exercise or run, I often cannot breathe as deeply as someone who has never smoked.
Every day I regret ever smoking, and this is why I hope I can encourage you if you smoke or know someone who does, to make the solemn vow to quit smoking. To quit smoking successfully, you need more than just a plan. You need a strategy.
WHY A QUIT-SMOKING STRATEGY WORKS
If you want to succeed at anything, a plan is not enough. A plan is merely a series of steps you need to take to achieve your goals. A strategy takes into consideration your weaknesses and what you may have learnt about yourself from the other times you tried to quit and failed. When plans fail, we want to give up. A strategy, on the other hand, sees failure as mere setbacks to learn from, improve and try again. Also, a strategy forces you to evaluate what could go wrong, before they go wrong. The focus is on the execution more than just the end game.
When it comes to winning the battle against smoking, you are going to war with a very sneaky enemy. So let’s take some wise words from the ancient Chinese military strategist, Sun Tzu.
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you will need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” ~ Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Know thy enemy. Cigarettes are an addiction, not a habit. Nicotine is as addictive as cocaine or heroin, if not more.
SMOKING IS AN ADDICTION
Cigarettes are big business, and so is quitting smoking. As such, there are many quit-smoking plans offered by “professionals” and health institutions alike. I have tried enough of these methods to tell you that any quit smoking plan that involves nicotine replacements or considers smoking a “habit” is doomed to fail.
The nicotine patch made my skin itch and my heart race. The nicotine gum made my throat dry and did nothing for my cravings. I have also tried drugs like Champix and Zyban which gave me such a massive headache that the only thing that made me feel “better” was… you guessed it… a cigarette! In addition to these nicotine replacements, I have also wasted money on hypnotherapy and acupuncture. None of them worked.
Don’t be fooled into thinking smoking shishas, e-cigarettes or vaping are lesser evils. You cannot cure an addiction by feeding it the very thing it craves & desires. In this case, it is nicotine. You need to cut off the supply. While cold turkey is the most effective method, it is also the hardest. Here’s how I did it.
HOW I QUIT SMOKING IN 5 STEPS
STEP 1: FIND A FOOLPROOF METHOD TO QUIT SMOKING
After I decided cold turkey was the way to go I sought to find the most effective all or nothing method to quit smoking. I discovered a best-selling book that has helped millions of smokers quit smoking overnight, written by an ex-smoker who at one point chain-smoked 100 sticks a day.
The book is called “Allen Carr’s Easy Way To Stop Smoking”. Celebrities like Jason Mraz, Ellen Degeneres, Anthony Hopkins and Ashton Kutcher all swear by this smoking cessation method. Allen Carr, who died of lung cancer in 2006 at the age of 71 after being smoke-free for 23 years, also set up smoking cessation seminars, which I found more effective than the book.
Thanks to Singaporean actress and singer Pam Oei, who brought this highly effective quit smoking clinic to Singapore, you can now sign up for this course and make the decision to quit smoking today. The method does not use any gimmicks, useless aids or substitutes. It also does not require you to use any willpower whatsoever, and the best part is, there is a money-back guarantee if you do not succeed at quitting.
I must admit it took me three sessions to quit successfully, but I am finally free of the nicotine trap that enslaved me for over 20 years. I am a HAPPY non-smoker and do not ever feel like I am deprived of cigarettes. And you can be free too!
STEP 2: GIVE YOURSELF A TIMELINE
Once you have decided to invest in your health and take action with your decision to quit smoking, set up a quit smoking timeline. The goal for me was to quit smoking by the age of 40 (by August 2015). This was a New Year’s Resolution I was determined to keep.
On New Year’s Day of 2015, I booked my spot for the “Allen Carr’s Easy Way To Stop Smoking” seminar. The sessions in Singapore happen as often as once a month. Many people quit smoking after the first session, but if you fail, don’t fret. There is no extra charge for the remedial sessions and your money back if you should decide to continue smoking. As I mentioned, it took me three attempts before I finally quit successfully. My third attempt happened to be just before the Easter weekend so that was symbolic for me. It marked a rebirth.
Is there a significant date that you would like to set as your quit date?
STEP 3: DO SOME SOUL SEARCHING
I reflected on all the times I had tried to quit smoking and dug deep to find out why those efforts failed. Many other quitting methods will tell you to avoid situations that “trigger” the urge to smoke — for example, stress, alcohol, coffee or certain friends. However, life is not always something you can control. How miserable you will be if you have to avoid going to parties because your smoking buddies will be there with booze!
It is important to take ownership of your addiction. One beer cannot be blamed for unravelling your best intentions to quit smoking. I realized the reasons I had failed was because I had used all the wrong methods.
One time I even tried chewing on straws as someone told me smoking was an “oral fixation”. Another crazy method I came up with involved chucking all my cigarette butts into a large glass jar in a bid to gross myself out and quit. The plan was to stop smoking cold turkey once the jar was full. Unfortunately, it was so disgusting, that I needed a cigarette to feel better about myself. Ridiculous. Another common method I tried was the gradual reduction method. You are supposed to slowly cut down the number of cigarettes smoked in a day until you reach zero. I did not get very far with that method.
My previous efforts had failed for three reasons:
- I was in denial of the fact that I was addicted to cigarettes.
- Letting go requires surrender of the ego. I was too afraid lose control, so I relied on willpower.
- I secretly hated myself and my life, contrary to the happy, confident image I projected.
That last realization hit home – I smoked because I did not love myself enough. Do you know the real reasons why you smoke?
STEP 4: BE KIND TO YOURSELF
When quitting smoking you are dealing with two demons – the physical withdrawals and your negative inner dialogue. All of my insecurities came to the surface when I tried to quit smoking. Because I started smoking as a teenager thinking it would make me look cool and feel confident, I realized that smoking had stunted my personal development in a lot of ways. I had not done the inner work and learnt how to cope with stress, challenges and failures in a healthy, constructive way.
This is why it is so important to find a cold turkey method that offers you the right tools and support to overcome this addiction. It can be hard to ignore that voice in your head that tells you lies like “people only like you because you are the life of the party when you smoke” or “just one cigarette and you’ll feel better’.
The positive effects of quitting smoking was more than the noticeable improvements in my physical health. The day I said “no” to smoking and “yes” to myself, a journey of self discovery began and has continued until this day. Removing cigarettes from my life finally gave me the opportunity to heal all of my broken pieces and practice self-love.
If you smoke to self-soothe a traumatic past, what are the ways you can heal from painful memories and live fully present? What are some of the ways you can pamper and nurture yourself?
“One of the hardest things was learning I was worth recovery” ~ Demi Lovato
STEP 5: CELEBRATE YOUR SMOKE-FREE LIFE
An essential part of my strategy was to come up with ways to celebrate my newfound freedom from cigarettes. Learning a new skill or exploring your talents and passions help to rewire your brain and rebuild your self-esteem.
While smoking is a physical addiction and an emotional crutch, it is also an activity that your brain has attached certain thoughts, actions, places, people and events to. The only way to break this association is to create new ones.
Do Something Different
Instead of smoking when you’re stressed, call a friend to talk about the issue that is bothering you. You’ll be surprised how many people in your life need to be needed by you. Instead of smoking when you’re happy, dance in your room. Exercise releases endorphins that lift your mood and floods your body with good vibes.
When I finally quit smoking, I wanted to celebrate everything I thought was awesome about me, this time without the negative self-criticism. Resuming my singing lessons brought me joy and also helped to improve my breathing. Learning aerial hoop reignited my passions as a former dancer and helped me to reconnect with my body.
Then with all the money I saved from not smoking cigarettes, I treated myself to a solo holiday in Bali. I celebrated my 40th birthday learning to dive and getting my PADI license. Later that year, I commemorated my smoke-free life and newfound stamina, as one of the #RunToLiveGreat ambassadors for the Great Eastern Women’s Run.
EVERY ENDING IS A NEW BEGINNING
A whole new world that I could not have imagined opened up for me as a result of letting go of something that was holding me back and preventing me from realizing my true potential. All I needed to do was to take that leap of faith.
“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase”. ~ Martin Luther King
What could be in store for you in your bright future if you decided to #quitsmokingtoday? How would you celebrate your freedom from this insidious addiction? #shareyourstory
If you are ready to put an end to this self-torture and finally stub out for good, I sincerely recommend the “Allen Carr’s Easy Way to Stop Smoking” seminar. Full disclosure, I am not being paid to mention the book or the seminar. It is a highly effective method that I wholeheartedly support.
Please share with me your quit smoking journey or challenges in the comments below.
I wish you a happy, healthy and smoke-free 2020, with many years to come.
